Jan 19th I left the house twice in one day, once with real clothes on

Hello!
            The title of this blog may not seem like much to normal people, but leaving the house at all is an accomplishment, twice is unheard of. Once I had on jeans. Yesterday, I had to get my blood checked and ended up having to go by the hospital to get cross-typed to get blood. My hemoglobin was only 6.8, but I was feeling better. Again, I don't know myself anymore, because how I feel is relative to how bad I have felt. They said it wouldn't be ready till today, so I went back home. Last night, I decided that although my counts were low I would go to small group. I figured that I'm going to the hospital twice in two days, so that was more risky then going to fellowship with my brother and sisters in Christ. I realized on the way to small group, that this was the first time since October, Jonathan, Evalyn, and I have all been out together. Well, in Nov. they both came up to Emory but I was already there so it doesn't count.  I can't go many places and when Evalyn goes somewhere, it's usually with Jonathan. We are so paranoid about me getting sick or even Jonathan or Evalyn getting sick, and we are so busy with doc appointment, we stay at home most of the time so that we can be together. See if Jonathan or Evalyn gets sick, we have to be separated.

Oddly, I wanted to take pictures of our outing but then didn't get a pic of the three of us.

                     This was very haunting to me to realize that we have not been out together and drives the point home even more that we are not normal. Evalyn does great meeting new people and with everyone that sits with here but I realized last night that she is not getting exposed to different environments let alone other children. I would love to start going to Momma/baby group or something but I'd have to wear a mask the whole time and I'm not really supposed to be around kids that have recently had live vaccines, which I would not know. It's natural for kids to get sick and build up immunity but what if Evalyn got sick and I couldn't see her or take care of her while Jonathan had class, that wouldn't work, not sure what we would do??? Hopefully we will have some nice warm days soon and at least go to the park or something. I think that I'm going to contact Full Bloom, an early parenting center in Athens, to see if they would be willing to start a group for children/parents that are immune defficant. There has to be people out there like us.
                     FYI, here is the link that that video that I was talking about where Evalyn is laughing.
                   At small group last night, we celebrated Mirka's birthday. Jill made dinner and we had prayer time. This women is so wonderful. She loves the Lord with all her heart and she can't help but pour out that love on others. Sean is truly blessed to have her as a wife and we are blessed to have her in our life. Mirka, we love you and loved the food that you sent home to us. Thank you for all that you do! We had a great time last night and Evalyn and Brook laid down together for a little while, they even held hands :). We love all of you!
                  Please continue to pray that one or both of the potential matches will be a match for me. I'm kinda getting on pins and needles about it. Don't tell me that if you were in my position, you wouldn't be able to stop yourself from asking yourself, "What if they say I don't have a match?", " What if I don't make it?" No, you can't say that you wouldn't because you would. I'm shedding some tears as I am writing this because the thought is overwhelming. I don't want to die and not see my little girl grow up. I'm scared of God's plan, this is scary stuff. Not that I don't have hope and faith because I do.... it's the peace area that my human side really shows through. I was reading yesterday in proverbs and the Lord told me again that this is in his hands.


The mind of man plans his way,
But the LORD directs his steps. Proverbs 16.1