Nov. 10th Hollywood Glam and Small Group

Good day everyone.... Warning: THIS IS TOTAL RAMBLING. YOU MAY WASTE MINUTES OF YOUR LIFE INSIDE MY HEAD AND YOU CAN'T GET THAT TIME BACK.

                Last night, I watched a awesome 1950's movie, All About Eve, with Betty Davis and Anne Baxter. It was wonderful, mostly clean, old Hollywood fun. That's when I would have wanted to be movie star. My goodness though, they sure smoked a lot! Marilyn Monroe is briefly in the movie, she is gorgeous. My aunt Judy always says I have Betty Davis eyes. I remember my Nanny Cox telling me as a child that I have bedroom eyes too. You have to be careful with eyes like these.... I only use them on Jonathan when I really need to, but I rarely do, I know that he is so in love with me. Not sure if you know, but I have the most wonderful, sensitive, thoughtful, smart, husband in the whole world. He is a really great person and one of the most non judgemental people I have ever met.  As in "All About Eve", I feel that sometimes he is a "Lamb loose in a Jungle." He is just too good for this world of pain and heartbreak. I know that God is going to glad to have him back in heaven one day... safe from this world. 
              Thank goodness I have a break in treatment today. I'm not hooked up to anything.... no chemo... no steroids.... no anti anxiety because the steroids make me nuts. I'm still on anti everything else but I guess my body will get used to it. I'm a little sore from the LB yesterday but it's not too bad.   I slept very well last night, almost too well. The things I read about babies is that sleep begets sleeps. So if Evalyn doesn't get her naps and doesn't sleep well it effects the next time she sleeps. That seems to be what happens to me. I slept so well that I could hardly get out of bed this morning. With the encouragement of my wonderful nurse, Dawn, I did some laps around the unit. It made me feel better. I tried to pretend I was walking around the lake at my house... didn't really work. I may try the i pod next time. I may look cool with one ear plug hanging out and b bopping down the hall. As far as I know, I'm the youngest person on this floor, so I'm sure it will just make me look younger, and that's ok with me. The masks that we have to wear outside the room are horrible. I feel like I can't breath. Issac, a male nurse here, not sure why male nurse always sounds funny ( Meet the Parents, ha ha.) said that if you pretend your a Ninja it's makes it better. That entertained me for a few laps. Issac is not single.... sorry SISTER.
               As I have said over and over, the staff here are amazing. I'm getting a little allergy sinus thing and I'm glad they are open to me trying some of the homeopathic things I do at home. I'm getting a nettie bottle today to use. They know the last thing I want is more medication. I didn't like my tech very much last night. She didn't do anything wrong, we just didn't connect. I politely asked her for some apple juice late last night, when she gets a chance of course, and she said " it will be a little while" I said very sweetly " That's why I said when you get a chance." She just doesn't seem to like her job as much as everyone else does, and I don't have much liking for people that choose to stay in a job they don't like. Life is too short for that. My Poppa Bill always taught me that. He's had more jobs than anyone in the world, I think. At home, I was working on interviewing him and writing down some of these stories. Well back to my tech.... So today I told the director that I request not to have her again... that we just didn't have a connection. She of course said that was fine. I think she likes me. She came by yesterday just to talk with me about what things I see can improve around here. I told her I would work on a short list and get back to her. I want to make sure I keep the list small so that something actually gets accomplished. She can only change what she has control over.... the big ideas will have to wait a while. I wan't to make sure that I'm doing what God wants me to do and not what I think I should be doing. Without the direction of the holy spirit it is easy to just spin your wheels. Been there. 
      I'm getting nervous about starting treatment again tomorrow and being on the steroids for another 4 days. So everyone watch out, I can be very productive on steroids and get myself in trouble. I imagine it's like being on meth, then crashing. Thank god I never got into that crap. I know friends that did.... it was and is a sad sad road. Don't even get me started on how the meth epidemic has affected the children of this nation and the amount of foster care that is needed. I think after having 3 girls live with me, and then losing them to divorce ( not totally lost :), just not living with me anymore) may prepare me for foster care, if that is what God has for us one day. I have a heart for it for sure.
I missed small group last night. Jonathan and I meet at Sean and Mirka's house on Tuesdays nights for bible study and fellowship. We have 7 people right now.... just right. This Tuesday night group is our church. Sunday mornings just have never worked out for Jonathan and I. We just couldn't find a place where we feel at home. We are home with this group. The amount of support this group has given us would blow your mind!!! Mirka's I miss your soup :(. Sean, I miss your rambling interesting facts to make something I have heard over and over new. Jill, you are my best friend, and I like you. Steve, I miss saying things about your freckles and hearing you start off a sentence with "Well...." Michelle, we are just getting to know each other and already you are my sister in the Lord. I'm excited about you taking care of Evalyn next Tuesday!! I know you all were praying for us last night at group. I felt the spirit of the Lord on me. 
      Today my mom and sister are coming to visit. Should be nice, they are funny. Heck, I'm pretty funny too, if I say so myself.